Today, I want to talk to you guys about self care and how important it is to just make that time for yourself. Even if it means ignoring some tasks like dishes, even if you think you don’t have time for it, even if you can’t fathom ignoring that laundry. Please, just think about yourself. You deserve it!
The importance of self care
This post is a small plea to ask you guys to please make some time for yourself! When we are so busy taking care of everyone else, it can be easy to forget about yourself. It’s so important to make sure you pay attention to your own well being though!
Before I broke my leg, I was really in this system of neglecting myself. I didn’t have time to make myself lunch because the baby could wake up so I had to work! I had to mop! I had to do all of these things! They all generally take longer from a wheelchair, so how could I possibly make time to brush my hair or drink that extra cup of tea? How many times did I tell my son, I had to go sweep and then we could play?
In getting so wrapped up in doing all of these things I needed to do, I made the mistake of forgetting to put my wheelchair on the brake for a task I normally know I need to. Instead, I figured, I’d save myself three seconds of work and in turn, I neglected my own safety. Now, I need to have surgery, and will need my leg in a cast for three months. I didn’t save myself any time by failing to put my wheelchair on the brake. Instead, I caused months of pain, struggle, and discomfort for my whole family.
My example may be extreme, but it can also be relevant to think about in terms of mental health and well being. We as parents do get worn down with the many tasks that need to get done and put ourselves on the back burner. But an exhausted, grumpy mother who hasn’t spent any time on her own mental health does no one any favours.
Sure, you can push yourself to get the dishes done late at night or the wash folded, but the next morning you wake up with less patience. Be better than me, just take a little bit of time for yourself! Take a bubble bath, grab a glass of wine (or whatever you like!), watch a movie with your husband, just do something for you! Taking care of yourself is just as important as mopping! Actually, after the horrible last two weeks I had, I’d argue taking care of yourself is even more important!
Now, with my broken leg and upcoming surgery, my husband and I were talking now about how we took our previous rhythm for granted. We both felt that there wasn’t enough time to get our things done – for my husband to work on the house, for me to clean and work on the blog. And now? We don’t have time for anything because I’m basically out of commission.
It shows me that I need to give myself more grace. Keeping ourselves as parents healthy and happy is just as important as keeping our children healthy and happy. If I’m not feeling well, how can I possibly take care of my family to the best of my ability? If I am really so focused on taking care of my home that my own safety is no longer a priority for me, there’s a problem with balance in my home.
I know it’s hard to make time for ourselves, but I’ve realised just how important it is. Even if I struggle to make myself a priority because I care about me, thinking about the message I am sending my children has really helped me to shift gears.
Our children learn by observing us. Hands down, parents are major role models for their children. When we make time for ourselves, we are teaching our children a very valuable lesson – to value themselves!
When I am showing my children that I am taking time to do something for myself (read a book, get dressed, get a manicure, etc), even if it is small, I teach them that I also matter. It matters that I show my family that I do things besides taking care of the home! That I have interests, things I enjoy and goals, too!
I teach my son that if he is married later, how he can treat his wife (give her breaks, etc). I do not want my son to see his mother as a ‘victim’ of the home in a sense. I love my work as a mother and wife and would never trade it for anything, but I much prefer to teach my son that I am happy in my role, that I am strong in my role!
Similarly, I make time for myself, I am sending a message to my daughter. I teach her that if she becomes a wife and mother, she should also take time for herself. That becoming a wife or mother does not mean that she has to lose her identity or that she no matters. Because let’s be real, that is exactly the message I had been giving my children when I would skip meals to go clean up the kitchen. Seriously self, why?!
I wouldn’t want my daughter to feel that she didn’t have time to do something for herself in her family later. Why is it okay then for me to do that to myself now?
This little sequel to my update on my broken leg is really just meant to encourage you lovely, busy folks out there – and I know you’re out there – to just stop, relax, and take a break. Don’t forget about yourself. Eventually something will have to give. While it may not be as serious as what I am experiencing, I hope that maybe by reading my story, you can just give yourself a little bit of slack, and treat yourself and hopefully before any sort of hump hits!
In general, let’s appreciate what we do have and give our loved ones a big hug and kiss! You never know what curve ball life will throw at you tomorrow!
See! Here I am taking my own advice! My family had a super lazy start to the day today! My husband watched some tv with our son, and I nursed the baby and read a book. I normally would rush out of bed to make breakfast for everyone, but today, I stayed put and enjoyed the time with my family having a lazy morning.
Sure, breakfast was later than normal, but no one starved to death! It was actually so sweet because once Y was done with our relaxing start, he said he wanted to go downstairs. I asked if he wanted to get breakfast started. By the time we came downstairs, Y had set the table and had gotten everything we needed to make breakfast sandwiches (cheese, bread, lunch meat, butter, some different types of jams etc). It was so sweet! All that hubby and I had to do was grab some coffee!
Had I rushed out of bed before my family was ready, I would have never given my son the opportunity to express so much initiative and give him the chance to do this! See, you never know all of the wonderful benefits of giving yourself some love!
Psst! I know today, I was super chatty and was basically just telling you to do something. You could be thinking, ‘that’s great and all, but how do we make time for ourselves with our busy lives?’ No worries! I have another article in the works with small, practical tips. And I’m always eager to read about your tips and advice for working in a little bit of extra ‘me time’ into your day!